Written by Roberto Orci, Alex Kurtzman, and John Rogers
Directed by Michael Bay

I was a niche child. I grew up at a time before many of the way-cool toys came out. I managed to hit the very beginnings of the Star Wars craze, and could just be considered nerdy and eccentric for an extensive collection of toys based on those films. But by the time, really cool toys, like Transformers, were coming out, I was way too old for them. I got the general concept from those commercials. You know Transformers! More than meets the eye! But overall I missed out on the craze.

In 2007, I went into the summer blockbuster based on the concept of those toys from way back when without a bias based on fond memories of my youth. That might have helped in terms of seeing some of the shortcomings of the film, but overall I came away thinking quite a bit of the film and the production, not to mention being able to finally enjoy all those toys because my seven year old son was now asking for them.

The first thing you must know going into this film:

Autobots = good
Deceptions = bad

Transformers opens with the narrative of the events that led to the Allspark landing on Earth. It then cuts to a military base in the Middle East where a helicopter thought lost several months ago suddenly comes up on the radar. The only problem is that it’s not really a military helicopter, but one of the Transformers known as Blackout. The helicopter transforms into this other robotic machine and proceeds to devastate the base. It doesn’t seem like anything is capable of stopping it. The Special Ops Team which survived the initial attack in the Middle East is attacked by another Decepticon. They manage to break a piece off and study it as they return to the States.

Back in the United States, Sam Witwicky (portrayed by Shia LaBeouf) is trying to get an A on a report so his father will buy him the car as he promised. They visit a used car lot where Sam falls for a beautiful classic yellow Camaro. It doesn’t look too hot and definitely needs work. Sam gets it. On the first day out, he offers a ride to one of the hottest girls in school, Mikaela Banes (portrayed by Megan Fox). Mikaela lets her guard down a bit to Sam and shows how mechanically inclined she is. What neither of them realize is Sam’s car is much more than just a car.

Meanwhile, the Secretary of Defense John Keller (portrayed by Jon Voight) is responding to the events in the Middle East by enlisting the help of computer analysts to determine what the origins of a signal that hacked the system are. He believes this will lead to who is responsible for the attack.

These three stories do eventually come together when the story of Sam’s grandfather finding an “Ice Man” leads the Decepticons straight to him. His car transforms into Bumble Bee and goes into protection mode. He eventually calls in other Autobots for help, and Optimus Prime tells Sam the story of the Allspark. He stresses they must find the Allspark before Megatron does.

Let me say, the one thing this film requires is the ability to suspend disbelief. Even then. It stretches the limits at times. I mean, you would think they would at least have to transform into something of the same mass, which is a problem when Frenzy transforms into things like a boombox and a cell phone. I also have a hard time believing that the Autobots follow Sam home at one point and manage to hang around his neighborhood in their giant robotic form without being seen by anyone, especially with the havoc they cause.

Transformers is loaded with cliches, including the evil government dudes who should just listen to all these kids cause you know they have a better way of handling the situation. John Turturro is a good actor in a cliched role as the sniveling government agent with his own agenda and who stands in the way of our heroes saving the day. There’s the leader of the Special Ops Force (portrayed by Josh Duhamel) who’s about to go home to his wife and child, but gets caught up in all this mess and is the gung-ho hero character. It was entirely predictable where his character was going from one scene to the next.

It’s not all bad, and I enjoyed quite a lot about Transformers. There are some great action sequences with many speeding car chases and battles between the various characters. The car chases are a no-brainer since most of the robotic characters are disguised as vehicles of some kind. These sequences were better than the battles simply because it was easier to distinguish who was who. The CGI is pretty good. I was dazzled in more than one instance by what can be achieved. The interaction between these characters and the humans works pretty well, although at times it did seem like I could tell the actors were just in front of a green screen.

I liked Shia LeBeouf as Sam. He was sort of geeky and nerdy, but not overly so. He just comes off as an awkward teenager who becomes cool because of the car he drives. It’s sad to say, folks, that’s basically true of the social order of many teenagers. His love interest has so much stuff thrown in her background that I couldn’t help but wonder why it is included – there’s no real purpose except to create a needless crisis that Sam resolves for her. That said, Megan Fox is beautiful and maybe I’m biased because she looks an awful lot like my oldest daughter. The jury is still out on her acting ability, however.

I felt bad for Jon Voight in the role of the Secretary of Defense who is actually standing there taking advice from teenagers and robots! Yes, let’s take the Allspark to the middle of a populated city for safekeeping. Great idea – not. It’s just another example of what seems like a teenage fanboy’s poor fan-fiction.

I guess Director Michael Bay would call the many instances where Transformers rips off other films as “homages“ but I didn‘t see it that way. The Allspark looks like the Borg ship from the more recent versions of Star Trek. There were parts that seemed to be straight out of The Terminator, Independence Day, and even The X-Files, not to mention Bay‘s own film Armageddon. After a while, It seemed like I was watching a composite of every summer blockbuster ever made.

Then there’s the problem of just who the movie is aimed at. I have a problem with producing a movie that’s PG-13 when it seems very obviously marketed to younger segments of the population. My seven-year-old son loved the movie and the toys. The rating is for “science fiction” violence which I don’t mind, brief sexual humor, which I believe goes over his head at this age, and language. Well, the language is pretty bad. All these toys based on the movie are out on the shelves, some for as young as age 5, and the movie is loaded with four and five-letter words.

The DVD comes in a special two-disc set with tons of extras, including commentary by Michael Bay, a variety of featurettes, and easter eggs. If you enjoy the movie, it’s definitely worth picking up. They didn’t cut corners with the DVD release.

Did I like Transformers overall? It’s a mindless enjoyable summer blockbuster. It doesn’t try to be intelligent or high-brow, just fun. It does achieve that. It’s far from flawless, but it’s typical summer fare and something I can watch again and again. I do let my son watch it but I know he understands we don’t always repeat words we hear from other people or on television. Other parents might want to consider whether they feel it’s appropriate for their child. That’s a shame because the strongest fans of the film would likely come from this market.


SPECIAL FEATURES:

” Feature Commentary with Director Michael Bay
” The Story Sparks – Steven Spielberg discusses his love for the franchise and early concept art for the film.
” Human Allies – A look at how the actors were selected and their experiences on the set.
” I Fight Giant Robots – An exploration of the military training that Josh Duhamel and Tyrese Gibson underwent for their roles and the various stunts that the actors were asked to perform.
” Battleground – A piece on the senior officials from the Department of Defense and Air Force who consulted on the film to give it authenticity and the key locations that the U.S. government provided access to.
” Rise of the Robots – Explores the interaction between Hasbro designers and Michael Bay to bring the toy line roaring to life.
” Autobots Roll Out – Michael Bay discusses working with Chevy and its designers and the modifications that were made to the cars seen in the film.
” Decepticons Strike – The film’s military advisors discuss the “toys” they allowed the production to borrow
” Inside the AllSpark – ILM’s digital artists discuss the challenges of bringing the Transformers to life.
” From Script to Sand: The Skorponok Desert Attack – An in-depth look at the making of this particularly epic and challenging scene from initial storyboarding through production and visual effects.
” Trailers
” Easter Eggs