No, that’s not me saying that. It’s a phenomenon I’ve seen over and over again on social media. Some people have trouble realizing that, because of their views, certain spaces might not be comfortable for them. That’s all right, really. It’s pretty easy to find a place that is more in line with what you are comfortable with.

I’m in a book group on Facebook called Libby and Chill. I joined it to get more out of the Libby app that I use to borrow audiobooks from my library. I learned a number of things that helped, particularly when it came to paying for non-resident cards at certain libraries so I could borrow books that weren’t in the New Hampshire library system. I also learned recently about being able to modify the length of time I borrowed a book for. I enjoy the group, because, as the saying goes: Reading is political. The beliefs of most of the people in the group are along the same line as my own, so it’s nice to be able to comment about certain books and not face pushback from people whose grip on reality comes from Faux News.

Go search for book groups on Facebook. There must be thousands of them out there, if not more. There’s even a group titled Book Lovers for Trump. I could get into why that’s an oxymoron, but I’ll leave it at that. Everyone can be comfortable in their own place. Right in the group rules, it states that there is political discourse in the group. In general, it’s a place for people like me, who enjoy reading and are worried about the direction our country – and the world by extension – is headed.

However, it seems that at least daily, if not several times a day, there are people who have to comment, “Is this a book group or a political group?” It’s both. Usually, the ones asking that have voted for Trump. A quick glance at their profiles will reveal this. Sometimes they are the people who think that they can ignore “politics” because it doesn’t affect them. They wear their privilege proudly. None of us can force them to change, but they seem to want to change the space of this group to better suit them.

They are getting close to 60,000 members of that group. I like it there. I like the discourse. I like the book talks we get into and the political talks. Sometimes it makes me think. Above all, I feel reassured that I’m not the only person who feels the way I do, even among strangers.

Why is it that when there are so many choices out there, people want this group to change what it is? Why can’t people have a space that they are comfortable in without others coming and trying to change it? I’m not going into Book Lovers for Trump and telling them what to do. Yet people want the group Admins to change the name of the group or eliminate the political discussion.

If I join a group and I don’t like the tone, I simply leave the group. Why is it so hard for people to do that? There seems to be a pervasive attitude among many that their way of seeing things is the only “right” way, and your group must operate according to their standards.

I was invited to a couple of groups that promised “balanced discourse,” only to find that it was people pushing a right-wing agenda. I simply left the group. I didn’t feel the need to scold the Admins or flounce my way out of there. I don’t have the patience anymore to argue with people who can’t even admit the truth that’s right in front of them. I don’t stay in places that upset me. It’s that simple.

The Admins are getting tired of dealing with the posts that complain about the vibe of the group. Out of nearly 60,000 people, it’s a small number that do this, but much like the real world, even though we outnumber them, they are loud. I don’t blame them. You want to enjoy the group and the vibe, and you’re constantly dealing with some people who think the group should change to suit them, rather than deciding that the group doesn’t match their values and simply leaving. I hope the group stays around for a while. It’s one of my favorite places to read, both for book recommendations and for the reassurance that I’m not the only person in the world who thinks the way I do.